No regrets. You always can learn.

The last weeks and months – I need to admit – I did things that in the end not even I could understand why I did them. Sometimes I felt, I was too nice with people that didn’t deserve it, sometimes I thought I’m crazy and a masochist by doing all the time similar, but still different, types of mistakes. But all of them brought me one step further. I got on my friends´nerves with my crazy stories and often resulting depressions. Kind of embarrassing sometimes, I know. So I can understand if people are now surprised that I say: I do not regret anything. I learned a lot and I feel – even if there are all the time new surprising things in my life – I can handle certain situations better. For instance I learned what is the most important to me. Concerning friendships and relationships the most significant is not the intensity or the type of the problem itself. But the behavior of the persons.

Ignorance is definitely the worst one can do to me. No communication, no reaction at all – no dialogue, no exchange of ideas. No mutual understanding. Not even giving a try. THIS is what is the worst. The second thing I’ve learned is, that friendship is about respect. It is not about promises and nice words. It is about listening, finding out what actions a friend would hurt and trying one’s best to omit them. And if this is not possible, having at least the courage to admit it and trust in that the friend will understand you. And third, it is about loyalty. Feeling for the friend, staying on his side no matter what kind of stupid thing he committed. And about defending his interests in front of others.

I get along now with quite a lot of things. The stories of this first half of the year are all finished. What remains is just what you’ve learned and what hurt you the most and will make you more sensitive in future – and this is actually not bound to one of those persons involved. It is just about a certain disappointment you will never forget, about the mistakes you made in general, the will not to commit exactly the same ones again but it is also about the knowledge that some similar things will always happen in your future life. Again and again. Just be prepared and have the courage to face them. And, never regret anything after.